I have several friends whose birth certificates read "Robert."
Some go by Rob. Others Bob. Some Robert. One - and only one - is called Bobby. I have yet to meet a Robby (except when they* were in trouble with their moms), but I've heard they exist.
When someone introduces themselves as "Robert," I call them Robert.
When someone introduces themselves as "Bob," I call them Bob.
Friends I know who prefer "Bob" will threaten to punch me in the genitals if I call them "Bobby."
Friends I know who prefer "Robert" will slap me upside the head if I call them Rob or Robby.
So, out of respect (and self-preservation), I call them by the name they ask to be called.
That's not "political correctness" - it's decency and kindness and common sense.
This is why I'm confused by the transgender backlash hoopla. I know people who absolutely refuse to call a person by the pronoun or name they prefer, no matter how often they ask. Those folks are making some kind of stand: defending the sex organs said person was born with, I suppose.
And yep, then it gets all kinds of weird when folks have to pee. (I can't tell you how little time I spend watching other people pee. But apparently this is a thing.)
I don't get it. I would never say to a "Bob": "Damnit! You shall be called Robert, as your parents and God ordained it!"
I would never say to a "Robert": "Jesus says thou shalt be called Bobby, no matter what ye think!"
Nope: I call Bob, Bob. I call Rob, Rob. I call Robert, Robert.
And I call Diego, Diego - and refer to him as he/him/his. Because he asked me to. Even though he was called "she/her/hers" and carried another name for most of his early life. That doesn't mean I don't sometimes fumble and say the wrong thing. And when I do, I apologize. Profusely. Not least because he can pack a punch. You should see his gauges and ink.
Seems to me, that's just what civil people do.
* - intentionally bad grammar, for obvious reasons. The most recent OED has decided they're cool with it.
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